Mercedes Benz Hybrid SUV

INT. 2010 MERCEDES BENZ HYBRID SUV - DAY

MAIDEN drives with passenger SAGE northwestward through the streets and avenues of Manhattan.
Destination: Ice Cave Mountains, Ellenville, New York.

SAGE
I don’t want to distract you
and your attention towards
what’s outside the windshield.

MAIDEN
I’m paying attention. Don’t fret.
Just explain how you figure
you got to see it when it was
practically perfectly obvious
to those who should’ve seen it.

SAGE
Because … .

MAIDEN
'Cause why?

SAGE
Because we like you!
M-O-U-S-E
Mickey’s mouse!

MAIDEN
Donald’s duck!

SAGE
Donald’s duck!

MAIDEN
Mickey’s mouse!

MAIDEN and SAGE
Forever we can walk
and hold our heads up
high! High! HIGH!
Come on now and have some fun
and join our company!
M-I-C-…K-E-Y,
M…O…U…S…E… .

SAGE and MAIDEN chuckle at their juvenile behavior.

SAGE
We probably regressed back
a full decade of time
those last few moments there.

MAIDEN drives off ramp for the George Washington Bridge and travels north towards Palisades Interstate Parkway.

MAIDEN
Don’t turn around.
I think someone is following us.
Get the whirlybirds to check ‘em out.

SAGE opens glove compartment. Flicks switches. Turns dials. Three video monitors portray different aerial views of MAIDEN’s Hybrid SUV traveling north.

SAGE
Locking on infrared. Drones Betsy, Betty …,


Cupcake, listen.
If anything happens, and
things…? you know, if either one of us
doesn’t return to do the dishes tonight,
I want you to know I really,
really dug all those bowls of puddin’,
acts of pure love, … and
them there heapin’ dollops of
lumpy mashed potatoes —

MAIDEN
I made sure there were always lumps
in the mashed potatoes.
Never totally smooth …,
the size you like, too …, everytime. Remember
all those pumpkin pie slices,
with the whipped cream,
the chopped walnuts, … loved it!


SAGE
I do remember, Puddin', Cupcake, Sweetheart.
And Eternally grateful, I am.

••••

Learnin’ to love the presence of
Miley "Maiden America" Cyrus.

…